"Waiting to charge" on Treeya and Swanky

I’ve got the UEFI firmware and successfully installed Linux on both an older Swanky and a newer Treeya-QCDF. In Xubuntu 24.04 on both machines, the battery widget shows “Waiting to Charge.” Guessing this was an Ubuntu issue, I installed Debian 12 Bookworm on the Treeya, and it also doesn’t charge.

Is there a dance I have to do to reset the power controller or something of that sort? Did the years of neglect manage to completely trash batteries on both of these machines? Should I try Arch or some other distro?

Replaced the battery on Swanky and it appears to charge and run off the battery, so I’m going to assume it’s the same deal on Treeya.